Not Me Monday 11/17/08

*******UPDATED********

It seems everyday during the week, I have random thoughts of..."THIS is so going to be a 'Not Me " entry next week." but then, in the utter craziness of my life I forget them and try to pinch out what little remembrance I do have at the end of a very long week. So, here goes.

I did not buy the cutest white maternity top from Old Navy this week because I am NOT pregnant and that would just be absolutely crazy..(but for those of you who do not believe me, at least understand that I am really tall and I have issues with finding long shirts...and sometimes, just sometimes the extra length bequeathed to maternity tops hits me just great and I can not resist.)

I did not run away from the Monkey Exhibit at the Zoo last week when the Monkeys stopped being Monkeys and started doing "Monkey Business" Cause I am one of those cool moms who totally are down with the "How babies are made" talk...or at least I was until EVERY body part started having an alter ego within the minds of my growing boys.

I did not find and buy the cutest shoes at Target last week while shopping with my sister...because we were Christmas shopping...NOT shoe shopping. And they were NOT an amazing deep purple Mary Jane-like flat because there is no way that I would have anything to wear them with...oh and they were only $9.98!!!!

I did not buy my oldest son almost $100 worth of clothes for Christmas and almost fall out right there in the middle of Belks. Cause $100 is not THAT big a deal...did I mention that it was only FOUR items...and that usually when I spend a hundred bucks at a department store it is because it was an ADDITIONAL 50% off an already 75%...which is basically FREE and like twenty items MINIMUM!!!! I thought they would have to shock my heart to bring me back.

I did not spend 8 of the past 9 nights up with one or more of my children for PROLONGED periods of time and various cough-choke-gag-cough again-hint of fever-you better not puke on my bed maladies...cause that would be INSANE and I would then not be able to be a rational level headed mother in the morning.

I did not threaten my children with NO THANKSGIVING OR CHRISTMAS break if they did not make their fall goals...cause that would mean that I MIGHT NOT GET A THANKSGIVING OR CHRISTMAS break....and you don't want to see me at Easter if I missed Christmas.

I did not use the 1-2-3 punch of Tacos(for Saturday dinner), Hello Kitty Nightie(for Saturday dessert), and Meatloaf(Sunday after church meal) to make up to my husband the fact that I spent 4nights and 5days with my sister...cause I never use the power of a good meal and a great nightie to my advantage.

*****UPDATED*******

I have 6 sisters and 5 brothers...a few of who regularly read this blog. One of them sent me the following email with her own "Not Me" list. I couldn't help but post it...and I agree...she TOTALLY beats mine this week.

So I can't comment anymore on your blog for some reason, but here goes my Not Me Monday story... are you ready for it... I meant to leave it a couple weeks ago when it happened but at that time realized I couldn't leave comments for you under "name" anymore

So here it is...
I did not go with my friend/employer to a super fancy French
lingerie boutique while I was working. While we were Not there, I did Not
try on mulitple bra-panty combos that made me look and feel as expensive as they
were. Although all of the panties I tried on were done so over the thong I
was wearing, I did Not forget to remove the last pair of $50 grey undies from my
buttox and put my pants on over them with the tag blatanly hanging out the
back! After my purchase of the cheapest bra and panty combo they had at
the store, we walked out to the car and my friend Jennifer did Not shriek as I
leaned into the Expedition to strap her little man into his carseat as she saw
the tag to the $50 grey panties hanging out. I did Not jump into the front
seat, strip down as an old man pulled up into the spot next to us(AHHH!!), take
them off and sheepishly take them back into the overpriced French
boutique. Now I don't think the French owner believed my story, but that
doesn't matter because it did Not happen!
AHH!!!
That tops them all for
me.
Love ya,